Shelter From The Heat

Arbor - Latin, meaning ūüĆ≤
God Loves Trees Too

In September we experienced severe heatwaves which was abnormal and brutal. For three days on a stretch the sun bombarded us with recording heat, enough to scramble eggs. Some loved it, others hated it; others, didn’t mind or care.

As I walked on our neighborhood street, I was thankful for every tree that shaded me along my way. From the strong and humble Weeping Willow  to the common yet stable Marple, or Oak. I was prayful that our street is laden with so much variety and shade. For I know what it’s like to walk in the scourging sun, no trees in sight for a long time… drinking your last drop of water just hoping that there is shade ahead. #Unbearable.

Trees Beautiful Trees
#ArborDays #TreesMatter

As a non-active Early Childhood Educator, I am free to teach my 7 year old daughter about nature-especially the botany in our community. I have a facination with the landscapes and the natural foliages of a city. I have never planted a tree in Canada yet; however, I always try to have flowers  and a kitchen garden. I’m thankful for all the people who have great regards for the trees in their immediate neighborhood.  My hope is to participate on Canada’s Arbor Day by helping to plant trees. 

#TreesMatterūüĆ≤ūüĆ≥ūüĆī

Happy Planting!

jjf (c) 2017

Dear Canada

IMG_20170702_154123

An Open Letter of Gratitude to Canada

Dear Canada:

It all begun when I was asked by my cousin to travel with her to Ottawa. I had one week to prepare. Thank God that in 1992, you allowed the Islands of the British CommonWealth to come to your shores with only an approved passport. We didn’t have to travel to Barbados to obtain a visa for visiting relatives and friends who had already settled in your land. Irony is, now that I am Canadian; many have no clue where St.Lucia is on the map. Today you’ve granted me the privilege to apply dual history and culture.

I was fortunate to have landed on one of your most prestigious airports, Pearson International in Toronto.  After our passports were stamped with all kinds of important information, we made our way to the vast space to wait endlessly to be taken to Ottawa. As we waited for what seemed like forever; for the strangers whom we’ve never met before to pick us up from your capital, I couldn’t help but observe that you had all kinds of strange people in your land: people whom I have never recognized or seen before in my homeland of St.Lucia. My eyes opened so wide that I had no time to take a nap or to sit still after our 5 hours plane ride. The energy of so many nations moving in all directions simply mesmerized me.

At 26 years old you were my first virgin flight, I arrived on your  land  in the cold month of April. It seem ordained that I had to come to you for the other two and half decades of my life. The Creator had a greater plan for my life and for you O Canada; for you have taught me things that no other nation on earth could have taught me. You transformed me into a strong, mature, and confident Afro-Caribbean-Canadian woman. You chose to adopt me, engrafting me into your culture, your people, and your landscape.

It was not easy at the beginning but you made it possible for me to see my way through the many languages,accents, dialects, which my ears had to get adjusted too. You‚Äôve allowed me to walk through your educational institutions without discrimination, and if it existed while I was there, I didn’t dwell there, for I knew that my new motherland was greater than the ideology of an oaf; her approach is that of dignity and the value placed on human lives.

Because of you I have made friends or met others along my way from various countries on earth. You showed me how to be kind by the way you show kindness to all who come to you  for refuge.  You are a harbour where the hurting and the dying come for refuge; and you give hope to  they that have dreams and want to soar.

In this great year 2017, as you celebrate 150 years of standing for peace, love and quality (equality); I want to express my heartfelt gratitude to you for creating policies with me in mind. For giving me the privilege to have access to social services, health care, and continuous education. I want to say thank you for providing for my two daughters whose navel cords are buried in your soil. Thank you for opening new doors for me. Thank you for being one of the best countries in the world.

Stay safe Canada, you are loved!

Sincerely yours,

New Citizen

jjf ©  2017

Just Rest

 

Just Rest

When your soul pains in despair

Lay your head gently to rest upon the Savior’s breast

When tiredness grip your loins

Rest assured that His love will carry you on

God will never give up on you

No matter how far you run

He will carry you in His bosom

Lift you when you fall

He’ll embalm your knees, wipe your tears

And let His glory shine on your countenance

Remain assured as you rest your life

In the Master’s hands;  He will guide you on.

Jjf @ 2016

The Call

“I heard the voice of the Lord saying, whom shall I send?” –Isaiah¬†

 

In my silence

Deep within,

I heard the voice of whom my soul loves.

I answered the call with much difficulties

Without understanding the path laid out for me,

I simply trust.

I trust the Master’s plan

To take me to the promise of my deliberation.

I do not force myself to remember my past,

For it follows me like a shadow

Coming and going as it pleases.
Staying longer when the sun shines

In every crevice of my being

Measuring against my present

Stalking everywhere I set foot.

Then a stillness steps in

To rid the shadow too monstrous in nature;

Too stubborn to let loose of its hovering

Sometimes, I hide

Not a hiding of a coward; but one who waits,

Till the calamities be overpast

Sometimes, I face it with a force–

A force, a strength, which is completely supernatural-

Connecting me with the Source.

(c) 2015 jjf

For No Reason

#MeToo

The valley of Tears girl crying

 For No Reason 

This prose was written in 2014 as part of my healing from the pain of sexual abuse. Through an amazing in-depth counseling group for women in transition, plus the love and the prayers of believers helped in my healing for a better life.

I dedicate¬†this prose to all those who has been through sexual abuse and sexual assualt, and is still struggling with the healing process. Always remember you are not alone.¬† As a child and teenager I, too,¬† was sexually molested by family members, neighbors and ‘so-called’ friends.¬† By writing this¬†poem/prose¬†I managed to¬†get rid of the venom¬†of¬†the abusers¬†who attempted to hide in the crevice of my soul.

Before my complete healing, I¬†tried getting deliverance through so many means: smoking, drinking, clubbing; but, too no avail. On and off depression trailed me like an old snake, which tried its best to suck the blood from my heels. But ah, Jesus Christ came to my rescue.¬† I was able to get my thoughts untangled from the abusers’ web. Thank you Lord!¬†¬†

Presently, my aim is to¬†encourage and to bring healing to others who were victimized and violated by any type of sexual predators. I am willing to donate my story. Yes, it’s time to tell! They¬†are evil; they can’t see the eyes of the babies crying, they have blocked their soul while drawing on the pure breathe of their own seeds.¬†

A new dawn has drastically arrived to help in our inner healing, the listening ears of those who care are here to help us, we are not alone. #MeToo #YouToo

 

For No Reason

Yesterday, while on an errand I stole some time to play,

I didn’t think of time and space; only wanted the day

To skip over wild flowers, small rocks, even to dodge wild dogs

Pause for moments to watch hogs dig in the dirty river,

And to find a way through the murkiness of logs.

I greeted the neighbor, and was summoned inside-

Never occurred that I was sentence to be chide.

The fubsy shadow covered the wall;

Creating a blanket for my great fall.

There he was sitting in his usual chair,

‘Chile come over here’

And with no hesitation held me forever,

As my blood dripped upon his massive finger-

Shock and in pain fear flooded my spine.

Who can I tell of this ordeal of mine?

For no reason I couldn’t tell father or mother,

I dried my tears and promise to stay away from

the monster upstairs-

I heard no whisper,

Only quiet and silence.

And when I wish that the anguish would wash away,

With every hurricane or flood lifting from the quay-

Another greeted me with charm;

No sense for alarm.

All the while scrutinizing my ripe age,

My innocence now trapped in a cage.

Every other night while mama worked hard,

My dearest gently spread my legs out wide-

Pierced me with his stick, then gave me candy for treat,

¬†Drawing from a cistern that didn’t belong to him.

Deep within I became the song of grim;

No good hymn could soothe my soul.

As the heavy breathe of alcohol streamed down my neck,

Dead to the smoke which blinded my perception:

‘Mama didn’t care’

And¬†somewhere the whisper came, ‘don’t cry’

Quiet. Silence.

Tears forming creases on the corner of my eyes;

Where are you God of whom mama spoke about-

Yet, I have not abandon you my Lord

Maybe you have a¬†reason for what I couldn’t describe,

‘Cause the sun still shone on me every morning,

And if there was no sun; the moon guided me

Out of the Valley of Baca

Out of a name that doesn’t belong to me.

Oh, how I wish that the angels took me away to be cleanse-

In pure waters, ever flowing waters;

To wash away the guilt that stained me for no reason.

Today the trees didn’t move, the grass didn’t sway,

The clouds stood still-

I wanted to die, for soon another came by.

Was there a spell cast on me?

Was there an attachment to the imps, the devils which ravished

The young who cries daily for a savior?

The darkness seems endless, when will the light come?

Yet, the more I desire for the light; darkness approached with its

Peeping Toms-timing and watching my every move;

Like outlaws, fugitives, they cast shadows behind back doors,

Longing to touch: measuring, drooling, in the madness of their minds

Locked me within.

Then for no reason the anger for getting no answers

For my sexual mishaps drew me to conclude:

That the sons of my mother’s womb might not be brothers after all,

Uncles whom I should have embrace,

Or fathers of any kind, pasting floors-

While lusting, sweating for their kin

are all devils in disguise.

The constant hitting of my ankles against the small rocks,

My¬†steps couldn’t keep up with my thoughts,

So I started running,  running from their grip;

Running from under their dark clouds.

Ah love, my questions are endless.

I see whom my soul loves:

‘Don’t cry’, the whisper said

Quiet. Silence

For no reason I was taken away;

To heal myself of the deep hidden concoction of their sexual exploitations-

And from beyond I have seen that they can no longer hide

Behind the veil of deception.

Ah, thoughtless, never saw tomorrow coming,

How blind to have planted seeds of your corruption.

Now dead before poisoning my entire being;

I spoke life to my womb and mind,

I ask Him who is ever merciful, to have mercy on your souls.

Then I rest my last question:¬†‘Why such¬†agonizing pain?’

Why my love, whom my soul seek after?

Again, the whisper came-

Quiet. Silence.

(c)2016 jjf

Reference for Image:

A young girl crying http://arrested-development-ministry.blogspot.ca/p/signs-of-childhood-sexual-abuse.html

The Valley of Baca is found in the Psalm 84:6. According to commentary a place which was dry, hard and unpleasant. A place of weeping or lamentation.

Random Notes of Love 1

valentine_heart 1

I love the month of February because I was born on the sixteenth. February- the love month – giving and loving and sharing and forgiving; well, that’s what they say. The sweet repetition of the conjunction ‘and’ makes everything add up in the love month. Over the years, I wrote many short pieces about love: love and friendship; love and heartaches; love and hate; love and life; love and death; misunderstood love; and love, love, love…but I am learning the greatest love of all is in my savior Jesus Christ!

The old cliché-short, sweet and spicy!

Enjoy. ‚ô•jjf

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Invitation (Edited)

Our time of hate is in the past

Now it’s our time to love

Your colorful eyes follow me around,

Are you afraid to stare?

Yet, you like what you see

Are my lips too full to swallow yours?

Are my eyes too deep that you feel helpless?

Come, you can taste my honeycomb

Don’t be afraid of the light

There is so much that I can teach you

Come, feel me

Not in secret places, come

Let’s go to the mountains

It’s fresher there

Our time of hate is in the past

Now it’s our time to love,

Again.

(c) 2016 jjf

**************************************************************

To Argue Love 

And if we argue, fuss, or fight

What good it’s gonna do tonight?

You take a piece of my heart

and with the same breathe say, ‘I love you’

What good it’s gonna do today?

(c) 2016 jjf

****************************************************

 Restless Dove

I’ll contend for you my love

as sure as the stars are above

though you may try to fly away

my love for you will multiply,

though distance may keep us apart,

though others may try to steal your heart;

 my grip on you shall never depart.

(c)2016 jjf

********************************************************************

Indecision

Can I look at life in a two way fold

Can I walk through two open doors

Can I share love fifty-fifty

What then shall I do?

Deep into those eyes I am afraid

Deep into the past I keep remembering

Deep into the future I have to go

What then shall I do?

(c) 2016 jjf

**************************************************

A Song of Longing

I’ll be there before the first rain falls

I’ll be there before you close your eyes

If all the rain should stop falling

If all the fruit trees stop bearing

If all the birds stop singing

My love for you will never change

My laughter will be heard throughout the land

To bring joy to your heart

I’ll be there before the sun sets

I’ll be there before you close your eyes.

(c) 2016 jjf

**********************************************************

Question to Self

Do you love you enough?

Asking the same questions over and over again:

Who do you think you are?

Do you love your thoughts?

In a whisper: do you love you?

Do you love your neighbor as yourself?

Go ahead, it’s good to love you too

Why should you hide who you are?

 The stars burst in its firmament

Blazing a wink that extends the universe

And we who are on earth can look and behold its wonderment

The beautiful array of God’s love canopied above us

Why should such love be hidden?

Go ahead,¬† it’s good to love you;¬†

And you will have no hindrances loving your neighbor too.

(c) 2016 jjf

Image from:https://www.google.ca/?gfe_rd=cr&ei=0DslVZnRN8yC8Qe36oC4DA#q=valentine_heart+1

Uncensored proses-From My Journals

Season of Depression

Time flies

But does it really for me?

The orbit spins faster, my head’s spinning, swirling

Falling deeper into the hole

like Alice in Wonderland,

My head’s in the wrong direction

Pause, I fell fast asleep

Then I awoke to no more sunshine, but

The canopy of dark clouds hanging over me

 I sighed, does time really fly?

Sir, have you seen the time?

I left it here a minute ago

Before slumber weighed down my eyes…

(c) jjf 2016